The STUFF Sisters -Posts from April 2015

And So We Tussle

In general, those in the Simmons tribe like opposition that is clearly defined and worthy of our full battle abilities.

Two nights ago, in low light and with a drink in my hand, I was asked how my dad was. A good friend was wondering about the ongoing cancer that lives in my father. This friend can handle most of what I put out, and I blinked twice before answering.

In general, those in the Simmons tribe like opposition that is clearly defined and worthy of our full battle abilities. My father lives with a very picky strain of non-Hodgkin lymphoma that is a bear to treat. His goal, our goal, for the last four years has been to gain remission so he can undergo a bone marrow transplant and possibly knock this cancer down a notch or two and then put it to bed. Three completed chemotherapy protocols have not done that – but one got him damned close. “Close, but no cigar,” as a grandfather used to say.

In the next few days, my father will enter another treatment that he and his doctor already know will not bring him remission, but it is the only option available to him at this time. It’s like we are all waiting for science to catch up to his need. His need, and the needs of probably thousands of others as well.

And so we will tussle with cancer. I am viewing this as not a full-fledged fight but a skirmish. We will help, and hold, and laugh, and cry. And wait. He will be sick again from the poisons he will ingest, and we will all dream of limited reactions on his part.

I asked my friend, with a voice that quietly betrayed my emotions: Who really wants an all-body rash?

Photo note: This is my dad, my stepmom, and my son on the night my son was crowned Homecoming King last fall. There will be more nights just like this in all our futures. Of this I am certain.

Creative Gifts

I received this care package in the mail last week.

A gift of creativity is always appreciated.

It was unexpected. It brought me joy. It reminded me why people love getting gifts of art and creativity. Even a co-owner of a store, like me, dedicated to the mission of sharing creativity with the world, needs a reminder once in a while. The happiness it is spreading is immeasurable.

I had re-posted on Facebook an article about a recent study that found that coloring is good for adults. You can read about it here at the Huffington Post. Julie Cates, an accomplished artist and friend, had responded. And, I believe, that was where the seed for this deeply appreciated gift was planted.

Since my original post I have come across another post about coloring books intended for adults. Again, it made me happy to know that coloring, this seemingly “for children only” hobby, has many benefits. You can find out about the newly published coloring book here, coloring book for adults.

So, it turns out coloring is good for people of all ages. And, I for one, will be coloring more often and well into my years. Join me.

Fake It to Make It

This year the Brookside St. Patrick’s Warm-up Parade snuck up on us. And, frankly, we were not in the mood.

This year the Brookside St. Patrick’s Warm-up Parade snuck up on us. And, frankly, we were not in the mood. Winter had managed to get us down. We were snapping at each other about little details daily. This is not like us. We are snappy about stuff all the time, because we read too much news and care sometimes too much about the condition of the world. But we are not often snappy at each other. This year the parade preparation had us acting like snapping turtles. (At least they are green, which is somewhat in the spirit of St. Patrick’s Day.)

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So we arrived at the parade grounds with fake smiles on our faces – the ol’ “fake it to make it” trick. As the parade began, we looked at each other and silently shared, “Let’s get this done.” With each step of the parade, our real smiles grew. Every shout out helped heal our frustration. The bright and warm sunshine burned off the winter fatigue. As we pulled onto the final block, we looked at each other and smiled – giant smiles of pure joy. There was nothing fake about these smiles.

We were bathed in our community and the power of sunshine and happy people. In one short mile, we were healed. We lingered at the end and resisted letting it come to an end.

Until next year….

Casey & Sloane

Casey & Sloane Simmons
Sisters & Co-owners

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We Went North for Spring Break

The final spot on the map, just a few months before he would be college bound. Sounded like a spring break trip made in heaven…by an only child with doting parents.

Dakota had a dream. A wish, really. A desire to visit all 50 states “before I go to college.”

Those last words were spoken to us, his parents, when he was maybe five years old. To him, and to us, that deadline seemed forever away.

He has always loved maps. Even as a small child, he would hold them while strapped into his car seat and look them over. Occasionally the map was indeed upside down, but that only made the flash on my camera react faster.

We thought he might not continue with this wish. I mean, really, most children that age will tell you they want to be policemen and firefighters and veterinarians when they grow up. Few of them follow through on those adamantly delivered statements. Things change. They change.

But not our son. This wish to visit all the United States stayed with him. Our driving trips to Florida became missions to see Alabama, Mississippi, Louisiana, and Georgia “on our way.”

Our son was insistent from the beginning that you could not count a state as “finished” just by driving through it. You had to do something real or see something real – a Confederate cemetery, the Tuskegee Airmen Museum, a Usonian town – and then you could chalk it up as completed.

So, state number fifty presented itself to us this year. North Dakota. The final spot on the map just a few months before he would be college bound. Sounded like a spring break trip made in heaven…by an only child with doting parents.

We loaded the car – with only two days provided for this journey to and fro – with pillows, water bottles, cameras, a mom, a dad, a kid, sweets, and a dear friend of mine. My friend and I met in junior high – not middle school! – and she has a desire to visit all the states as well. (North Dakota was #34 for her.) She shares a deep love of travel with Dakota, and they adore each other on multiple levels.

It was short, sweet and delightful. Too much food, too much driving, too much cold. But never enough friendship, laughter and smiles.

There can never be enough of those last three.

Note #1: All photos were taken in one day in two states. Many were in North Dakota and a few in that other Dakota.

Note #2: In an effort at full disclosure, state number forty-nine was Delaware and was mistakenly overlooked last year during the “East Coast Mop-Up Tour” with his grandfather. Dakota also visited Delware during this spring break, with his friend, Ryoko. Every member of our family has seen to it that Dakota had help – financially and transportation-wise – reaching this amazing goal. To my mom, her partner, my sister, my dad, my step-mom, and everyone else, I say thank you for making this amazing dream come true. Wow. What a lucky kid.

Note #3: The Grand Forks Herald – and the amazing Marilyn Hagerty – saw the magic in this trip. Our lunch with her was the the trip’s focus, the thing we “did” in that state so it could be checked off and counted as complete. She left us wanting to spend even more time with her. Read her words in the Herald here.